Friday afternoon I met a friend for lunch. He is an ex-coworker from about 15 years ago. We have kept in touch over the years. He has shown and express interest in me over the years. However, he always surface when I am in a relationship. I never really took him too serious. Well the last month or so, he has been trying to make arrangements for us to see each other. He lives about an hour away and he works 2 jobs. I have busy schedule playing mommy taxi with BB having multiple practices and/or games almost everyday of the week.
Now I have some concerns with dating this guy. I have expressed my feelings to him concerning them. He disagreed with my assessment and stop communicating for about a week. I think I hurt his feelings but I believe in being honest and I did not want to lead him on.
Now back to the lunch. We agreed I would meet him for lunch near his job. It was cool. And that is exactly what I mean. Cool. I felt like I was out with one of my boys. No sparks for me. However, I feel bad about it. I don't know why though.
He keeps telling me I am the one who got away. That phrase always bother me. In the last month I have heard that comment too many times that it got me thinking. How did I get away? We were never together. How did I get away? Where did I go? How did I get away? Did you ever express an interest? How did I get away? Did you attempt to make changes when I express my needs and desires?
These are just some of my random thoughts about this whole dating thing. I want to start dating but I am not so sure. Sigh